My favorite pictures from the photo shoot

I liked so many of the pictures that I can't pick a favorite!

My thoughts

I have been thinking lately about how fast time goes by.  It seems like it was yesterday that my parents, my brother and I were living together in our little house.  I have wonderful memories as child, being loved and taken care of by my parents, having no worries about anything.  My brother and I were the center of my parents' life and even my grandmother's life who so lovingly took care of us as my mother went to work.  I had a wonderful childhood.  As I think about these things I realize and I guess it is normal as you get older to think a lot about your past.  When you are young, you have a big future ahead of you and that is what you think about, your dreams, hopes, your career, family and many other things.  The stage that I am in right now is kind of like a middle, I think back and also forward.  Thinking back, it is hard to believe that so much has happened in my life.  I write these things so that I don't forget them.  We are told to keep a journal and this is my journal.   I don't do it to boast or to feel better than anyone or to have people feel sorry for me, since that is NOT something I like to do.  I do it so that I don't forget them so that I remember how blessed I am.  Thinking back to when I left Puerto Rico, I knew in my heart that is what I needed to do.  I remember the excitement of being on the plane on my way to Utah, and my new life. This was about June 3rd, 1983, and I was 17 years old.  I turned 18 in September.  My heart had mixed emotions.  Leaving my family and all that I knew behind was HARD!  My parents did everything for me, but I was anxious to learn and do things on my own.  I needed to grow!  It was the best decision for me then to move.  I was told that I would not survive by myself, perhaps because they saw how I was raised and I don't blamed them, my parents babied me. But I did just fine! In about a month I will have been living in the United States for 30 years! That is pretty much my whole life. A lot has happened in those 30 years. I married, had a child, became a widow and a single mother and married again and it all happened so fast, all in the first 5 years of being in the United States. Losing a husband in a tragic car accident and becoming a single parent overnight is hard to take.  I feel it is easier to talk about it now.  I probably should have had some sort of counseling but I did not.  I felt so alone and that no one cared.  I was bitter and angry.  I moved to Provo to go back to school and nobody in the Ward cared.  You hear about President Monson and how he cared for the widows, well that did not happen to me. I didn't know my bishop. I was active, I went to church every Sunday.  I was living in an apartment with my cousin and his wife and above us was a member of the bishopric but he never visited me.  The bishop never visited either, only my visiting teachers and they did not know how to talk to me either.  I think they felt awkward, they were young mothers themselves and probably felt sorry for me.  I did not want people to feel sorry for me!  I kept wearing my wedding ring because I did not want anyone to think bad of me like I was divorced or had a child and was not married.  I was very depressed and sick to my stomach for a long time.  I was angry at life and felt that what was happening to me was not fair.  I moved to Provo because I was young, I was 21 years old and wanted to be around members my age and have a chance to find a good husband.  Even though I was angry I was thankful that I was young and still had my life ahead of me and I knew that some how things would turn around and good things would come my way, although I felt that no return missionary would ever want to marry me, a widowed mother.  So I concentrated on taking care of Ashley and going to school and making friends.  I would go to activities and tried to live a normal life.  Eventually my anger went away, my stomach issues stopped and I started feeling better about my future.  I was happy and was enjoying life.  When my attitude had changed is when I met Brent.  I knew when I saw him that I would marry him.  I remember like it was yesterday, when he walked in the room and the thought entered in my mind that "he was the only one that could handle my situation."  Can you imagine being told that he was the only one!! That there was no one else who would understand my situation!!! This was the answer to my prayer.  I thought no one would ever married me and that I would be alone for the rest of my life.  I was kind of preparing myself to be alone but I did not want to. Heavenly Father answered my prayer. But there was a problem, Brent was not interested. He loved playing with Ashley and felt SORRY for me.  I pleaded with Heavenly Father and said; "I don't know what to do".  I could not go to Brent and say, hey we are supposed to get married!  So my friend Julie and I decided to invite Brent and his roommate Todd to Preference dance at BYU.  We left an invitation with cupcakes at their apartment door.  I thought he was going to say no.  But he said yes!  We talked a lot that night and I felt I was the luckiest girl because Brent was such a nice guy.  I did not know him, this was really the first time that we talked and got to know each other.  After that Brent again was back to feeling sorry for me.  I kept praying because I did not know what to do. Then I had a thought, I have to do something so that he will think of me. I felt I should leave a note one morning on the windshield of his car.  I would drive by his apartment early in the morning because I had a car and was the "taxi" to all my friends. I would drive them all to UVU (then it was UVSC). They all lived in the apartment building next to Brent at the Glenwood so I would drive by his car in the morning. Because it was winter and the windshield was wet I would put the notes in plastic sandwich bag.  I sure hoped that he did not think I was crazy, but I did not know what else to do. My notes just basically said that I wished him to have a good day.  I guess it worked and he started to notice me and he later told me he was praying about me! He got the answer that he was supposed to marry me and the rest is history!  I learned that with the Lord nothing is impossible.  He answered my prayer but I had to work! He doesn't do everything for you, He wants you to do your part and learn to trust Him.

Here we are 25 years later on Tuesday, May 7th.  Life has not been easy and we have had our share of trials but again I am thankful that I learned at the very young age of 21 that I can trust in the Lord and that I know that things happen for a reason and that we can learn from our trials. I am thankful to have gone through all of that and all the other things in my life.  You don't think about it at the moment, "oh yeah I am thankful to be a widow!" But it is after a period of time when you look back and you see how you have been blessed and how the Lord has been there to help you and strengthen you and that he never left you alone that you are thankful for having gone through them.

I have met people who are surprised to see how long we have been married.  Brent and I have the most wonderful relationship. We LOVE each other and we are best friends.  I don't like it when he is out of town, in part because I think I have "traumatic stress disorder", again I should have gone to a counselor, but mostly because I don't like being away from him.  Every time he travels I worry something will happen.  I am getting better but I still worry.  We love doing things together, we don't get tired of being together. I go out with my friends during the day but at night I want to go out with him and no one else. Over the years we have learned to consult with each other about everything.  Even on little things, we call each other all day long and tell each other what is going on. I love how we are like one person now. When he is feeling overwhelmed, I feel it too, I can sense it over the phone.  We were young when we got married so we have grown up together.

Now looking forward there is still so much we have ahead of us, but I can wait.  I don't need the next 25 years to go as fast as these 25 years have gone.  I want life to slow down a little!!

I am thankful that Heavenly Father led me to Brent on that October day.  He put me and him where we needed to be.  He is the most wonderful husband who treats me like a queen, we are partners and we are equal and he has always treated me that way. He helps me be a better person. 

Genealogy and miracles!!!

I am so HAPPY today!!! After we were baptized I became fascinated with genealogy.  I would interview my grandma (mom's mom) and ask questions about my ancestors. It was during one of these interviews that I found out we were related to the famous Pirate of the Caribbean, Roberto Cofresi.  Alison was also interested in genealogy and on one of my mom's trip to Orlando she also asked my mom questions like I did with my grandma.  When my mom went back to PR she mailed Alison a beautiful letter that when I have time I will share in my blog.  My mom told her that because of the notes that I took she was able to do some genealogy.  She sent her a copy of my notes and I am impressed with myself that I even dated the page and wrote at the top "Historia de Mageña". Mageña is what we called my grandma so that says "Mageña's history" and it is dated January 11, 1979!! I was 13 years old. My grandma told me the story of when she was little, she had gone to the small market and the attendant asked her if she was related to the Roberto Cofresi? She asked why and was told because of the last name, it is in your family.  My grandma went home and asked her mom and she told her never to mention his name that it was a disgrace to their family.  I was so excited to hear that!! I have ever since then tried to figure out how we are related.  My grandma's grandpa was Jose Maria Irizarry Cofresi.  In Spanish we use both last names so Irizarry is the dad's and Cofresi is the mom's last name. Jose Maria's mom was a Cofresi.  The Cofresi family is from Cabo Rojo, Puerto Rico. My grandma was born in Cabo Rojo and the families married their relatives.  The pirates mother's last name was Ramirez de Arellano, which is my grandma's father's last name, so my grandma was related to the pirate from both her mother and father's line.  But I was not successful in finding the missing link, until Matthew Herzog helped me!! This Saturday I got the email where he finally connected my family.  I was in tears, I feel the spirit so strong!!

Before my mom passed away, we both tried so hard to find information on that line.  She has always known how much I love genealogy but she knew how hard it is to do our family.  Shortly after she died I got called to be the Stake Relief Society secretary and I felt that my mom had something to do with it, as if she wanted me to be with these wonderful women, because I was so sad she was gone.  I know now that I was called so that I could help with my genealogy.  I have always known that I would be the one in my family that would do the genealogy, it is something you just know and feel.  I have loved it since I was little! When it was announced that the Stake Relief Society secretary had been released I had the overwhelming feeling that I would be called as secretary.  A few Sundays later the Stake RS presidency came to our RS and I was conducting that day. My RS president said to the Stake RS president "No secretary yet?" and at moment again I had the strong impression that I would be called.  Not long after that day President Johnson, from our Stake presidency called my cell phone that he was coming to my house to meet with me and Brent.  I told Brent that I knew he was going to call me as the Stake RS secretary, and he did.  During one of our presidency meetings I found out that Matthew was Sister Hales (the Stake RS President's) nephew and that he helped others with genealogy.  I contacted him and now he has helped me with hundreds of my family members both on my mom and my dad's side. I know that the reason I got called to the Stake was to help my mom and dad get their genealogy done.  I know that from heaven they are helping me and Matthew and they are the ones directing this whole work, because I feel them so close helping me, I just know!! We have done so much work since my mom passed away.  It was as if my dad was waiting for her to be with him and for me to find Matthew and the work just took off!!  

So here is the Cofresi line:

Cristoforo Von Kupferschein was born in Bohemia, Austria (Prague) we don't know his wife's name yet. He had a son Fenicio Von Kupferschein, who was born in Kaernten, Austria and married Nicoletta Inrico who was born in Trieste, Italy. Their son Francesco was born in Trieste and married Orsola also from Trieste. They had a son Giovanni, who had a son Francesco who had a son Giovanni, who also had a son Francesco. This last Francesco moved from Italy to Puerto Rico, he changed his last name from Von Kupferschein to Cofresi because the Spaniard could not pronounce it. He was well to do and bought land in Cabo Rojo, Puerto Rico. He married a Puerto Rican named Maria Germana Ramirez de Arellano. They had four children one was the pirate Roberto Cofresi and one was my fourth great grand father, Juan Francisco Cofresi.  I am so happy that Matthew was able to help me.

When Alison was called on her mission to Italy, I was a little sad that it was not Spanish speaking.  I knew that she was going where she needed to be.  Trieste, Italy is part of her mission and I can't help but think how wonderful it is for to serve where our family came from!! I am so happy she is there.  To think that she is part Italian and is serving in Italy!! How I love genealogy!!!

Update on the Walmart commercial

Johanna, Natty and I went to the casting together a few weeks ago. We were interviewed in this order, Johanna, Me and Natty.  Johanna got a call two weeks ago and she went in to do the commercial first, with the lady that had been interviewed before her.  She explained to us the way that it works.  They call two moms and they compete for the commercial. They take you to Publix Supermarket and you go shopping like you normally would except you can't buy things that need to be refrigerated.  They give you $250 to shop. They take your receipt and compare it to how much you would have paid at Walmart. You have to buy brand name items that you can compare with Walmart. The mom that saves the most money wins and gets to do the commercial. Johanna saved 14% and the other mom saved 15% so Johanna did not get to do the commercial.

I got the call on Thursday and so did Natty (pictured here in the red shirt). Because we were interviewed one after another, so we get to compete for the commercial.  I think it is fun that at least one of us three will get to do the commercial.  Besides the $250 in groceries they also give you $250 in gift cards and it does not matter if you do the commercial or not you still get these thing! Just the other day I saw the commercial on the Spanish station Univision, that the other mom did! It was really cool.

Last week

On Thursday we went Conner's class play and violin concert, "Peter and the wolf".  Conner and another classmate who's name is Connor played Peter. Their outfit was a red shirt, black pants and red hat. After the concert Brent and I went to a park right by Lake Apopka in Winter Garden and had our 25th anniversary pictures taken.  I can't wait to see them, we had so much fun.  Sister Stewart was our photographer and she said that in the hour and a half she took over 800 photos!!! There has to be some good ones in there, right!!!

 On Saturday we had Conner's birthday party. We had a BBQ also and the kids went in the pool.

Luigi the Piñata.

On Saturday, Johann, Katty, Lily, Natty and I taught Zumba to the 8-11 year old girls in our Stake. There were about 70 girls! It was so much fun!!!

Here is the whole group.

What a small world!

We got Alison's e-mail this week and she told us that they (Ali and her companion) were teaching one of their converts, Jeremy, about genealogy and how to use the new family search.  When they were looking at our family they realized that her companion, Sister Eaton and Alison are 4th cousins once removed.  Brent and Sister Eaton are 4th cousins. Alison did not tell us how they are related she had forgotten the name but will tell us in her next e-mail.

Our engagement pictures from February 1988

These are our engagement pictures and were taken in February 1988.  I had completely forgotten that I had these slides in a box up in my closet.  It has been fun to look at them.  We have never owned a slide projector and so we never looked at them, only when we were picking which one to chose for our wedding announcement 25 years ago.  I looked on line and found a lady that transferred them to a CD for me. I could not think of a better time to do this than now, just before our 25th wedding anniversary. Time sure has gone by too fast!! I still remember the day that we had these pictures taken.  The sweater that I am wearing was the photographer's sweater. He wanted me to match Brent's suit.  The sweater was big on me but he made it so you could not tell too much!! Brent's front tooth was chipped, which I personally liked.  Later in our marriage he fixed it and I jokingly always say I liked it better chipped!

This one we chose for our wedding announcement and we have it hanging on our living room wall.

We look so young and with such an 80s look.  I love this picture. I think because he looks so hot and sexy!! I know my daughters will laugh when they read this!!

I remember closing my eyes. It never fails, I always do that!!

It is hard to pick a favorite because I love them all but this one is probably my favorite.  We look so happy and that is how we still are today!!

This one we have hanging on our wall.